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Thursday, February 28, 2013

Sunday, February 24, 2013

My Official Oscar Picks and Analysis


No matter what people are telling you, don't believe the hype this was not a great year for film.  What it lacked in films worthy of being labeled excellent we were hit up with a multitude of good, very good and near misses releases.  The Best Picture category exemplifies this best, with only one film cracking the FilmSnork 9-star threshold.  Most nominees for best picture will, for numerous reasons, not earn repeat viewings... not a good sign. 

Below are my ratings for all nine nominees:
  • Silver Linings Playbook                 9.0
  • Django Unchained                        8.5
  • Amour                                         8.0
  • Life of Pi                                      8.0
  • Lincoln                                        7.5
  • Zero Dark Thirty                           7.5 
  • Argo                                           7.0
  • Beasts of the Southern Wild         6.5
  • Les Miserables                            5.5 

Read my full review for each film here.


BEST PICTURE
Amour
Argo    WILL WIN
Beasts of the Southern Wild
Django Unchained
Les Misérables
Life of Pi
Lincoln
Silver Linings PlayBook  SHOULD WIN
Zero Dark Thirty


With great sadness I make my first prediction.  Argo wins Best Picture.  There was a movement that gained great momentum after the suspicious snubbing of Ben Affleck for director (conspiracy theorists* believe this was done purposely to push the film the frontrunner slot to make amends for a director done "wrong.")  As some of you know, I liked this film - LIKED it, not much more than that.  It is full of moments that feel like typical Hollywood concoctions... it turns out all the moments in this story that we are told over and over  (to paraphrase) "is just so crazy that people will have a tough time believing it really happened," turn out to be bullshit.   They felt like it in the theater and turns out they are.  If I did not walk out thinking how Hollywood some of these moments felt, only to have it revealed they were just that I would not be so let down with the almost certain fact that Argo will take home the big trophy.  And before you go saying, you are just a hater, you obviously have an issue with Affleck.  WRONG.  I cheered on his comeback, I even saw Daredevil in the theater.  I loved Gone Baby Gone.  The Town was my drive-in movie of trip for that year.  I DO NOT hate Ben Affleck.  The movie just does not deserve the praise it has garnished.   Django would be my frontrunner if someone told QT to wrap it up earlier.  The winner should be either Amour or Silver Linings Playbook.... I'd even accept Lincoln.    If Argo does not win the big one, that news report about the seismic action in the NYC region should not alarm you, that will just be jumping out of my seat and hitting the ceiling out of joy that the universe set things right.
*me


Best Supporting Actor:
Christoph Waltz, "Django Unchained"   SHOULD WIN
, WILL WIN
Philip Seymour Hoffman, "The Master"
Robert De Niro, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Alan Arkin, "Argo"
Tommy Lee Jones, "Lincoln" 


I am torn here, do I vote with my heart or with my head?  Christoph Waltz delivers one of my favorite and one of the best performances I can recall.  Out of all the candidates in all categories, he is the one I want most to win (I have others I want to see lose with more vigor, but I want him to win most.)  This is a pretty solid category - the only light work here goes to Arkin.  The reason I am most likely not picking Waltz is he is the most recent winner and I fear that will work against him.



Best Supporting Actress:
Sally Field, "Lincoln"
Anne Hathaway, "Les Miserables"   WILL WIN
Jacki Weaver, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Helen Hunt, "The Sessions"   SHOULD WIN
Amy Adams, "The Master"

Who's not sick of watching Anne Hathaway overact, on-stage, while picking up a trophy?  No hands.  The only thing that will stop her from walking away with gold is that sentiment.  The long MIA Helen Hunt is my pick for most deserving and my dark horse for the night.  It would be great to see her take the trophy.  Another great field of candidates.





Best Director:
David O. Russell, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Ang Lee, "Life of Pi"
Steven Spielberg, "Lincoln"  WILL WIN
Michael Haneke, "Amour"   SHOULD WIN
Benh Zeitlin, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

The bigger story about this category are the omissions more than the actual nominees.  Experts were shocked that Bigelow and Affleck did not make the list.  Not me, I would have omitted them as well and replaced Zeitlin with Tarantino.  It is a tough call, would like to see Haneke or Russell win.  I really think this is anybody's trophy to win.



Best Actor:
Daniel Day Lewis, "Lincoln"   WILL WINSHOULD WIN
Denzel Washington, "Flight"
Hugh Jackman, "Les Miserables"
Bradley Cooper, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Joaquin Phoenix, "The Master"


Cooper had his breath through performance,  Washington his best in years, but Daniel Day Lewis will win.  Enough said. 

Best Actress:
Naomi Watts, "The Impossible"
Jessica Chastain, "Zero Dark Thirty"
Jennifer Lawrence, "Silver Linings Playbook"   WILL WIN, SHOULD WIN
Emmanuelle Riva, "Amour"  
Quvenzhané Wallis, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"





I would be happy with several of these nominees winning.  Lawrence for me was the most present and made me take notice.  Watts and Riva are deserving as well it is just that most their performances were in hospital beds... more fitting for a Supporting nod.

Best Original Screenplay:
"Zero Dark Thirty"
"Django Unchained"   WILL WIN, SHOULD WIN
"Moonrise Kingdom"
"Amour"
"Flight"



A great category.  Moonrise Kingdom is one film I expected to see with numerous nominations including best picture, instead this is its soul nomination.  I think QT walks with this one for the lines he delivered for Mr. Waltz alone. 

Best Adapted Screenplay:
"Lincoln"
"Silver Linings Playbook"  SHOULD WIN
"Argo"   WILL WIN
"Life of Pi"
"Beasts of the Southern Wild"



I think the Ben Affleck was not nominated so let's vote Argo train will make a stop in this category as well.  The two most impressive screenplays for me were SLP and Lincoln.  I hope I am wrong on my prediction. 

Best Animated Feature:
"Frankenweenie"
"The Pirates! Band of Misfits"
"Wreck-It Ralph"   WILL WIN
"Paranorman"
"Brave"

Best Foreign Feature:
"Amour"  WILL WIN
"A Royal Affair"
"Kon-Tiki"
"No"
"War Witch"

Best Visual Effects:
"Life of Pi"   WILL WIN
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"The Avengers"
"Prometheus"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Cinematography:
"Skyfall"
"Anna Karenina"
"Django Unchained"
 "Life of Pi"   WILL WIN
"Lincoln"

Best Costume Design:
"Anna Karenina"   WILL WIN
"Les Miserables"
"Lincoln"
"Mirror Mirror"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Documentary Feature:
"Searching for Sugar Man"   WILL WIN
"How to Survive a Plague"
"The Gatekeepers"
"5 Broken Cameras"
"The Invisible War"

Best Documentary Short:
"Open Heart"  WILL WIN
"Inocente"  
"Redemption"
"Kings Point"
"Mondays at Racine"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Film Editing:
"Lincoln"  
"Silver Linings Playbook"
"Life of Pi"
"Argo"  WILL WIN
"Zero Dark Thirty"

Best Makeup and Hairstyling:
"Hitchcock"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"   WILL WIN
"Les Miserables"

Best Music (Original Score):
"Anna Karenina"  
"Argo"
"Life of Pi"  WILL WIN
"Lincoln"
"Skyfall"

Best Music (Original Song):
"Before My Time" from "Chasing Ice"
"Everybody Needs A Best Friend" from "Ted"
"Pi's Lullaby" from "Life of Pi"
"Skyfall" from "Skyfall"   WILL WIN
"Suddenly" from "Les Misérables"

Best Production Design:
"Anna Karenina"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"Les Misérables"   WILL WIN
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"

Best Short Film, Animated:
"Adam and Dog"
"Fresh Guacamole"
"Head over Heels"
"Maggie Simpson in 'The Longest Daycare'"
"Paperman"  WILL WIN


Paperman if only because my girls thought the stars looked like Mommy and Daddy.

Best Short Film, Live Action:
"Asad"
"Buzkashi Boys"
"Curfew"  WILL WIN
"Death of a Shadow (Dood van een Schaduw)"
"Henry"

Best Sound Editing:
"Argo"
"Django Unchained"
"Life of Pi"
"Skyfall"
"Zero Dark Thirty"  WILL WIN

Best Sound Mixing:
"Argo"
"Les Misérables"   WILL WIN
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"
"Skyfall"

Outguess FilmSnork Oscar Contest: PART 2 (2013)


UPDATE:  WE HAVE A WINNER!

And it is NOT me.  


This year's winner is Sarah Martin.  You will be contacted in the next few days.

It was a close one, but I played it safe for one pick and had a brain fart on another.  Either way Sarah proved to be the worthy challenger.  Thank you to all that participated.  Please continue to utilize the site.  Your comments, "likes," and participation keep it going.

-FilmSnork  (02/25/2013)



It is that time of year again, time for The Oscars.  And the question on everybody's mind is, how the hell is this website still running?  And, who will take home the Oscar gold.

For the second time we are offering a chance to share in the excitement of the night.  All you need to do is outguess FilmSnork's Oscar predictions (which will be posted the morning of The Oscars.)

If you can get more correct Oscar picks you will be in the running to win the $25 Amazon OR iTunes GiftCard.  

Simply Pick ONE winner for EACH category.  Post your answers in the comment section below (you can register in seconds with numerous accounts, easy and beneficial.)

ONCE YOU SUBMIT YOUR PICKS ARE DOCUMENTED AND ARE FINAL.
 
To be eligible you MUST follow the FilmSnork Facebook and/or Twitter page.
Please notify in your entry what your username is on the site you follow.

Anyone that outguesses (and is a follower of one or both the required pages) will be entered into a drawing where ONE person will randomly be selected to win the GRAND PRIZE - the gift card.  Second place:  wins the opportunity to choose a topic for an upcoming FilmSnork story or review - you pick the topic, we write about it - you will not be disappointed.

All picks must be in by the time Seth Macfarlane's first unnecessary use of Family Guy voices or before the first award nominees are read... whatever comes first (I am banking on the Family Guy voices.)

Make your guesses and share the link with others.

Here are my reviews of all nine best Picture nominees:

Silver Linings Playbook  (2012)  9 
Django Unchained  (2012)  8.5 
Amour  (2012)  8
Life of Pi  (2012)  8
Lincoln  (2012)  7.5 
Zero Dark Thirty  (2012)  7.5   
Argo  (2012) 7
Beasts of the Southern Wild  (2012)  6.5 
Les Miserables  (2012)  5.5  

Find over 100 reviews in our every expanding REVIEW ARCHIVE.

Good luck.
FilmSnork



And the nominees are...
IF YOU ARE HAVING TROUBLES POSTING YOUR ANSWERS, EMAIL THEM TO filmsnork@gmail.com  - thanks.


BEST PICTURE
Amour
Argo
Beasts of the Southern Wild
Django Unchained
Les Misérables
Life of Pi
Lincoln
Silver Linings PlayBook
Zero Dark Thirty

Best Supporting Actor:
Christoph Waltz, "Django Unchained"
Philip Seymour Hoffman, "The Master"
Robert De Niro, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Alan Arkin, "Argo"
Tommy Lee Jones, "Lincoln"

Best Supporting Actress:
Sally Field, "Lincoln"
Anne Hathaway, "Les Miserables"
Jacki Weaver, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Helen Hunt, "The Sessions"
Amy Adams, "The Master"


Best Director:
David O. Russell, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Ang Lee, "Life of Pi"
Steven Spielberg, "Lincoln"
Michael Haneke, "Amour"
Benh Zeitlin, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Best Actor:
Daniel Day Lewis, "Lincoln"
Denzel Washington, "Flight"
Hugh Jackman, "Les Miserables"
Bradley Cooper, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Joaquin Phoenix, "The Master"

Best Actress:
Naomi Watts, "The Impossible"
Jessica Chastain, "Zero Dark Thirty"
Jennifer Lawrence, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Emmanuelle Riva, "Amour"
Quvenzhané Wallis, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Best Original Screenplay:
"Zero Dark Thirty"
"Django Unchained"
"Moonrise Kingdom"
"Amour"
"Flight"

Best Adapted Screenplay:
"Lincoln"
"Silver Linings Playbook"
"Argo"
"Life of Pi"
"Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Best Animated Feature:
"Frankenweenie"
"The Pirates! Band of Misfits"
"Wreck-It Ralph"
"Paranorman"
"Brave"

Best Foreign Feature:
"Amour"
"A Royal Affair"
"Kon-Tiki"
"No"
"War Witch"

Best Visual Effects:
"Life of Pi"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"The Avengers"
"Prometheus"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Cinematography:
"Skyfall"
"Anna Karenina"
"Django Unchained"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"

Best Costume Design:
"Anna Karenina"
"Les Miserables"
"Lincoln"
"Mirror Mirror"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Documentary Feature:
"Searching for Sugar Man"
"How to Survive a Plague"
"The Gatekeepers"
"5 Broken Cameras"
"The Invisible War"

Best Documentary Short:
"Open Heart"
"Inocente"
"Redemption"
"Kings Point"
"Mondays at Racine"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Film Editing:
"Lincoln"
"Silver Linings Playbook"
"Life of Pi"
"Argo"
"Zero Dark Thirty"

Best Makeup and Hairstyling:
"Hitchcock"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"Les Miserables"

Best Music (Original Score):
"Anna Karenina"
"Argo"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"
"Skyfall"

Best Music (Original Song):
"Before My Time" from "Chasing Ice"
"Everybody Needs A Best Friend" from "Ted"
"Pi's Lullaby" from "Life of Pi"
"Skyfall" from "Skyfall"
"Suddenly" from "Les Misérables"

Best Production Design:
"Anna Karenina"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"Les Misérables"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"

Best Short Film, Animated:
"Adam and Dog"
"Fresh Guacamole"
"Head over Heels"
"Maggie Simpson in 'The Longest Daycare'"
"Paperman"

Best Short Film, Live Action:
"Asad"
"Buzkashi Boys"
"Curfew"
"Death of a Shadow (Dood van een Schaduw)"
"Henry"

Best Sound Editing:
"Argo"
"Django Unchained"
"Life of Pi"
"Skyfall"
"Zero Dark Thirty"

Best Sound Mixing:
"Argo"
"Les Misérables"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"
"Skyfall" 

Beasts of the Southern Wild - Review (2012)

Hushpuppy's story is one of those magical little kids whose life experiences make here wise beyond her years.  Living in extreme poverty in part of the bayou cut off from the rest of the world called "the Bathtub, her mother has been gone for years leaving her alone with her tough love, constantly verbally abusive father who teaches her to be stronger as he grows weaker, oh yeah, there are also bizarre awkward fitting cameos giant prehistoric horned boar-beasts.

As a storm of epic proportions approaches life goes on as usual for the citizens of The Bathtub who are too proud, too stubborn or too stupid to get out of harms way.  Instead, they spend their times drinking, telling mystical tales and partying.  For a portion of the film I was captivated by the film; a slice of life I was unfamiliar with, a strong-willed little girl surviving in conditions mast of us could only have nightmares about, anticipating where it was all going what would we see, what would we learn.  Around halfway through I realized this was not going to happen.  No matter what I anticipated or hoped for the film was not going to provide these answers, instead of a journey we follow along an bunch of aimless wanderings.  It is overreaching on its too many themes, not providing the focus it needed to make it a more satisfying tale.  At the same time the film almost drops narrative with long stretches of aimless walking and time spent in makeshift floating devices that make their point then becoming repetitive.  

People will make the case that this is the world as seen through the eyes of a six year old on her own personal journey, but I really think that would just be an excuse.  My guess is the first time director, Benh Zeitlin, had a lose narrative in mind and then followed around Wallis through numerous photogenic environments hoping to capture some beautiful imagery then put some pseudo-enlightened narrative over it to try tie it together.  Maybe I am being a little dense and , but the metaphor for the giants beasts never quite made sense for me and seemed underdeveloped and unnecessary, taking away from the time that would have better spent with additional scenes between the father and daughter.

I understand this film was made for about $2 million,  that is not an excuse to jack up the score.  While the film is deserving of some praise for certain elements, little Quvenzhane Wallis' performance as Hushpuppy is admirable for a girl her age even if her delivery is monotone for the most part she is a great starer and the cinematography is beautiful - the story, although beautiful and emotional at times never uses its parts to form a cohesive whole.   It feels like a short film stretched out to feature film length, a wandering poem rather than a tale.  After all is said and done you can't help but wonder, what did we just watch, was there anything profound or just a bunch of mumble jumble mysticism of a storyteller looking to piece together some interesting, yet hollow elements.

6.0 out of 10

Friday, February 22, 2013

Lincoln - Review (2012)

Four score and seven minutes ago, we, your forefathers, were brought forth upon a most excellent adventure. Conceived by our new friends, Bill and Ted.   Wait, wrong movie.  Yes, Lincoln appears in this one as well but there is no sign of Bill S. Preston Esq. or Ted "Theodore" Logan.  Sorry.  Even without the two righteous dudes this film can be an excellent adventure and for some a bogus journey

How can this film deliver two completely opposite experiences?  That's easy, it is both a well crafted, stunningly acted, informative film with one of best ensembles to share a screen.  That's the excellent.  At the same time, it is a hell of a lot of talking in dimly lit rooms with almost completely no action and only a few raised voices that is sure to bore the life out of some audiences - that's the bogus.

The story of Lincoln's fight for the thirteenth amendment is a much deeper, richer story than you learn about in school.  If you enjoy history or more so the U.S. history the tug of war over the interpretation of equality will be more than enough to keep you riveted.  Even more so will Daniel Day Lewis' portrayal of Lincoln himself.  I think most people believe Abe only delivered historic speeches (i.e. the one quoted above from San Dimas High School Auditorium circa 1989.)  DDL breathes life into the man, no longer is he a tall guy with a beard and a certain Address in PA, he becomes is fleshed out, becoming for the first time for me, a real person - one that is funny, intelligent and passionate.  At the same time the war over slavery became much more just gunfights and cannons on Civil War battlefields, it was transformed into a battle of intellect, between politicians, rivals and neighbors where words were used to do the fighting. 

On the other side of the coin, this film will definitely not please all audiences. It is set during the Civil War, one of the bloodiest battle of all time and we literally see seconds of warfare - sure to be a disappointment to many.  Those going in expecting massive reenactments of the bloody battles will be greatly disappointed, but if they can get past that there is a good deal to appreciate here. 

Keep an eye on the cast, one of the best ensembles in recent memory, chock full of great actors - many faces you may recognize even if you don't know their names.  Solid performances all the way through.  And as stated everywhere, after receiving every award know to man Daniel Day Lewis is amazing - to be fair though, the hair and makeup at least deserve an assist.

No matter how you view this, as a captivating slice of American history or a long, talky bore Spielberg brings history to life, the question is, are you interested?

7.5 out of 10


Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Amour - Review (2012)

The opening scene says it all - there is no happy ending.  From there we taken back to better times with Anna and George returning home from a show and saying goodnight.  The last truly good night of their lives together. The next day at breakfast Anna sits down and mid-conversation goes quiet for an extended period of time, then the lights go back on she is completely normal.  An appointment with the doctor reveals she is not normal and the long steady road of declining health is right in front of them.

Maybe I am not the right person to review this film.  Perhaps it all just hits too close to home for me to feel good about telling anyone to see this film.  It is a technically sound film, with a script and performances worthy of recognition, but watching the final days of a long loving relationship is just not my idea of fun.

I have just too recently had to bare witness to much of what took place on screen - the conversations, the looks, the physical decline are all things that have been part of my life.  For the first time, I am not sure what to say.  This film felt like a reminder telling me, "hey buddy, no matter how good life is, it ends and it often ain't pretty."

The film is beautifully acted, directed and shot, everything comes across as completely natural - never do you feel like you are watching a movie, more like the inside look at the intimate and inevitable notion of one's death.  The director Michael Haneke does not try to play your emotions like a fiddle through music and sappy dialogue meant to bring about water works (though they may occur.)

If I took anything away from this film besides a two hour reminder of less pleasant days in my life, it would be that I need continue to embrace everyday of life and make the most of it.  The simple conversations, going for a walk, sharing breakfast and talking about the latest headline are mundane parts of the day until one day you can't share them with the one you love.  Sounds hokey, but it is true.  That is what is so amazing about film, it does not need to be all car chases and explosions, it does not have to be happy endings you can see miles away, it can be much more. 

Just over the course of writing this review I have begun to work out my thoughts and from my first keystroke until now my opinion of the film has improved.  I have been able to set aside (somewhat) the personal connections and issues came across while watching and am more able to see through death there is a celebration of life.

Still, can I recommend this for you to watch?  Not really.  If I do you will come back and slap me in the face or worse - this is not an easy film to watch.  So, no matter what I rate it, remember this is something you will need to come to terms with seeing.  This is not the sequel to a blockbuster, this is the last few pages of the novel of life.

8.0 out of 10

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Paranormal Activity 4 - Review (2012)

The first Paranormal Activity worked so well because it played on fears even the bravest of us have, things that go bump in the night.  A door closing, a sheet moving, a strange sound in the the night all had me scared and waiting for the film to hopefully return safety of a lighted room.  The second film did quite a good job of copying the format and keeping the fright factor very high.

Then came the third film, that's when it all went wrong.  Someone had the idea to answer questions.  If we have not learned from so many movie franchises before it, don't answer questions you don't want answered.  The third film (SPOILER AHEAD at least for the 3rd film) put a face to the evil, or better yet faces with what I am assuming is a coven of witches.  The less effective 3rd film went from a letdown to disaster in just a few shots.

Well luckily, the filmmakers saw their mistakes and fixed the problems, saving the franchise with an supremely scary fourth entry.  Ummmm.   At least that is what I was hoping I could tell you right now.  That is not the case.  The fourth film not only continues the downward spiral, it accelerates it.  Replacing scares with unwanted, laughably bad mythology the series has lost the found footage feel that made its predecessors effective.  Has no one seen the Blair Witch Project 2?   When a found footage film starts to feel so self-important that it abandons what made it work in the first place, fans tend not to like that.

Oh yeah, here's a tip for the producers from ole FilmSnork himself, NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR RECURRING CHARACTERS!  We do not want to learn whatever happened to little Hunter, especially when your casting director decided to cast him with the standard creepy little kid actor (think The Omen's Damien, but more hammed up.)  Just another poor decision that further reminds the audience this is not a real story, just another slick Hollywood film and as usual, when Hollywood tries to be slick it fails.  There is also a bizarre Xbox Kinect tie-in (product placement in Paranormal Activity, really??) that provides incredibly annoying green dot covered scenes that wear out their welcome the first of the several dozen times it is used.

The film is not a complete failure, Alex, the lead, played by Kathryn Newton is very natural and if not hampered down by other poor casting and other poor decisions could have been a successful lead.  There are also a couple of mild scare, but they only serve as a reminder of what they films could be.  Let's hope we have seen the last of this series.

3.5 out of 10

Monday, February 4, 2013

Les Misérables - A Review Set to Music (2012)

From the minds that brought you FilmSnork.com comes one of the world's most beloved songs, stripped of all its sensitive lyrics and replaced with our review.  Simply click play and sing along, enter a majestic world of review enchantment - the world of FilmSnork.com, America's #1 self-referential website. 

And now, I Dreamed a Dream  (watch it in HD)


If you would like to further discuss my feelings about Les Miserables, please do so in the comments section below.  You can register in literally seconds, but the benefits last at least 47 weeks, maybe even a lifetime.

Also, if you can sing and want to provide us with your rendition of our lyrics set to this timing, please do.  We will substitute you into the video and give you full credit.

Lyrics 

There was a time when hopes were high
When the buzz was good
And the trailer inviting
There was a time when I wouldn’t mind
that every word spoke a song
And the songs looked exciting
There was a time
Then it all went wrong

I dream of a time when shots were blocked
When cinematographers
seemed to be trying
I dreamed of more than close up shots
Is the art of shot composition dying
When every shot is tight and blurred
The camera operator seemed wasted
Has he heard of the rule of thirds
Shots came undone
An opportunity wasted

And all the casting wasn’t right
The weaker voice of Gladiator
As he tore the music notes apart
Anne’s overacting put him to shame

Wolverine performed just fine
Although some of his songs an endless blunder
Borat really hit his stride (great success)
But he was gone as quick he came

And still I dream it'll come to me...
that this film was somehow better
From the guy that brought us The King’s Speech
Thought he’d be a better director
I had a dream what this film would be
So different from this hell I'm seeing
So different now from what it seemed
Tom Looper has killed the dream I dreamed

6 out of 10 stars